My 2026 Predictions
If I'm wrong I'll just delete this post.
Pop Syllabus 101. Week 15.
Our last class of 2025! A year with such a strange dystopian vibe, it felt like one long day.
There were some standout pop culture moments… Kendrick’s Superbowl performance, The Bezos Sanchez wedding, Beyonce winning album of the year, that CEO and his HR side chick getting caught at the Coldplay concert. Overall, though, nothing felt particularly distinct or even exciting. It all kind of blended into a vague slop.
If 2020 collapsed time, 2025 endlessly expanded it. At times, the year felt so atemporal I struggled to sequence when things happened. Admittedly, this could be because I’m postpartum, breastfeeding, and trying to survive the beast we call Capitalism. Sometimes I wonder if some things really happened. Because there is no way Nicki Minaj had a brief stint as a Nigerian diplomat, Katy Perry became an astronaut then hard launched Justin Trudeau, and a denim ad had us debating about good genes. This can’t be real life!
If you’ve followed me for any amount of time, you’ll know prognosticating is kind of my thing. I am not a futurist, but I’m often right! With that in mind, here’s what I think will happen in 2026.
A Royal Reconciliation
In 2026, Harry and Meghan will return to the fold! I know it’s a ballsy prediction and it seems unlikely, but let me explain my thinking.
January will mark exactly 6 years since Megxit. That is a long time to be no/low contact from your loved ones. If for a moment we take out the fame, wealth, problematic imperial lineage, etc., ultimately these people are just a family. A fractured family, but a family nonetheless... At the core of the family are two brothers who have a unique experience with grief that very few people can relate to. That type of connection can’t easily be ruptured, even if it can be damaged. Now their sole surviving parent is dealing with severe health issues. I think the pull of life and the longing for a brotherhood will bring them back together. Even if their wives hate each other (allegedly).
My pseudo-psychological theories aside, the most obvious reason for reconciliation is it being the shrewd thing to do. Neither side is doing particularly well PR-wise. The UK arm of the family has spent 2025 clumsily dealing with the deviant formerly known as Prince Andrew. There’s also the ongoing and growing backlash to William and Kate moving to their “forever home”.
The Sussexes foray into the American entertainment industry has been uneven. It had an explosive and impressive beginning—the Oprah interview, a Netflix and Spotify deal, a record breaking memoir! Since then, things have spluttered. Their companies have a staff turnover higher than Snoop Dogg. There are also silly unforced errors like the Kris Jenner party photo weirdness.
Funnily enough, I think the House of Windsor will be the ones to initiate the reconciliation. They need it more than Harry and Meghan. The British Social Attitudes survey, which tracks public sentiment about the Royals, shows the family is polling at their lowest in its history. Yes, even lower than when Princess Diana died!
Tangentially, is it weird that I often wonder if Diana would be into filler?! I’m leaning no, but like all chic White women I think she’d be borderline anti-vaxx but polite enough to keep her views to herself. I digress!
Additionally, support for abolishing the monarchy has spiked. This is not good for them. The royal family’s legitimacy is reliant on the public’s goodwill.
Both sides of the family know they’re stronger together and I believe 2026 will be when they figure it out. It will either be a full-on reconciliation; think public appearance with both arms of the warring families reunited on the balcony. Or! They arrive at some sort of détente, and there’s a signal to the public that things have improved. Perhaps Meghan wishes Kate a happy birthday on Instagram, or there’s an orchestrated but made to look like its natural image leaked of Harry and William out hunting or whatever these people do.
You heard it here first!
From families coming together… to families coming apart.
The Big Trad Wife Divorce
“History does not repeat, but it does instruct” Thomas Synder
If you’ve been on the internet for a significant amount of time, you might have observed the different waves of what could be called momfluencers. You know, those women who sell us a polished heterosexual domestic fantasy. Or perhaps they’ve made (curated) messy authenticity their brand. Whatever they do, they make it look good and beautiful. They are aspirational.
Recently, I was thinking about the fact that many of the most prominent mommy bloggers of the aughts and 2010s now have lives and brands that do not resemble their mommy blogging beginnings. Whether it’s Jen Hatmaker, Glennon Doyle, or Rachel Hollis, the women who defined that era have undergone significant and—dare I say—courageous brand shifts. One crucial thing that many women in that generation share is getting divorced.
Now just because previous generations of highly visible mom influencer types ended up divorced and rebranded, doesn’t mean it’ll happen for our current trad wife set. However, what I will say is the type of gender performance that influencer trad wives engage in is excruciatingly difficult. I know they make it look easy, and some people have bought into the idea that it’s an ideal life for a woman, but there is nothing soft about a life with back-to-back pregnancies, having to stay thin, turning your home into a mini sound stage, and doing it all while raising children with all the crushing expectations that come with intensive motherhood.
There’s also the paradoxical nature of the trad wife image. These women are baking bread from scratch, selling a domestic fantasy of submission and tradition, but are often the family breadwinners. A subversion of the status quo. They are the reason the audience subscribes. They are the draw. They are the magic. However, research shows that when women outshine and out earn men, it doesn’t make their husbands happy. Instead, it puts a strain on the marriage.
Even though I think the trad wife divorce wave is inevitable—and 2026 kicks it off—the data runs counter to my instincts. Overall, the divorce rate is in decline! The only group with a rising divorce rate are couples over 50, with the most significant jump in over 65s. Turns out when women come out of the haze of menopause they get rid of their husbands. Ovulation blinds our judgement!!
We are however seeing a slight uptick in divorce in conservative states in the Deep South, where millennial women are bucking up against religious convention. Still, it’s not overwhelming evidence. I’m just going on vibes. Shoot, if the internet is to be believed the girls want to be and stay married. Raye is screaming, “Where the hell is my husband?”. I bet there’s a trad wife out there shouting into the wild, “You can have mine!”.
In 2026, she’ll throw him away.
The Body
First, I think we’re going to see The Sculpt look go full-blown mainstream. Previously, I’ve touched on some of the sculpt signs, such as the fact rib contorting surgery is on the rise. For me, the biggest clue that the ripped-yet-tiny body ideal will define 2026 is the fact we’re seeing a growth in body building among young women. We’re also seeing an increase in steroid use. While The Sculpt is already the aspirational body ideal in urban cosmopolitan centers, it’ll spread beyond big cities to suburbs and small towns.
I think the interesting thing about The Sculpt ideal is that these women are extremely small, but because they’re muscular they’re instantly viewed as healthy. Without the muscle, these are women you might speculate have an eating disorder, anorexia specifically. However, people equate muscles with health, and fat with sickness, so these bodies not only escape scrutiny, they’re admired.
Speaking of anorexia and ED culture….
We are in the throes of a great cultural vanishing. Ultra thin is back in. If I’m frank, I find it terrifying. If we continue down this path, 2026 will be the year where a high-profile celebrity dies from an eating disorder. Or perhaps one finally seeks help, and them sharing their diagnosis shifts the conversation.
In a year where there has been rampant speculation about celebrities’ bodies, I think we’ve placed disproportionate focus on them and we’re missing the fact that the great vanishing isn’t just happening to our starlets, it’s everywhere…
If you look across socio-economic groups, race, age, and sexuality, we are seeing an eating disorder crisis. According to a study in the Journal of Pediatrics, hospital visits for minors with eating disorders more than doubled between 2018 and 2022. The biggest jump was in juveniles with anorexia. Recently, the Children’s Hospital Colorado reported a 73% rise in patients who used its Eating Disorders Program. Those showing up with a higher frequency? Kids aged 13-15. Eating disorders are also increasing among the middle aged. Research is emerging that shows older women who have suffered from eating disorders in their youth are not spending their later years in recovery. Instead, they’re still suffering. I’m sure this climate does not help.
I hope it doesn’t take a death for us to reckon with our fatphobia and the ways we glorify thinness, but I fear that’s what it will take. I am speaking life, though! As the church mothers taught me to!
